Stagnant Cardboard

an original haiku

by kita & shen-shen

written while driving

all my ideas

packed away in boxes

creativeness gone

after packing my house up in 4 days i felt drained. and then people were asking for advice & opinions... and i felt that all my good ideas were packed, stacked, taped & boxed up. who knew moving was so hard? thank you shen-shen for helping me write this, a bold move to win back my creativity.

my girl, all up in your grill

This picture was taken by Rachel Ann. Thank you.

turning the music up... keeps the demons at bay

I love music. I love that it can totally make a cold, rainy day warm & brighter. It can evoke emotions from the whole spectrum.

Today was a day of overwhelming emotions of thankfulness & love. I sat in my office sharing with a friend about a church I used to go to for a weekly bible study in Ft. Lauderdale (Calvary Chapel)right after I became a Christian... and I started realizing that have grown. I've changed over the past 10 years. I've progressed on the journey that I started so long ago... from the girl with misguided Christian bubble-living & a self-focused life to the woman that loves God & loves people (I have not arrived thou). The prayers I prayed throughout the years pertaining to the deep yearnings of my soul have been answered... and I sat in my office, overwhelmed & wrapped up in love.

A good friend sent me the link to this song today. "Green Screens", from the band Sleeping at Last. Shot in stop animation, I love everything about it, lyrics included. It resonated. And prompted me to listen to it again. And again. 

I also love turning the music loud... not because I'm still going through my "rebellious teen" stage, but because sometimes I like to escape my thoughts & get lost in the lyrics... I heard an artist say that "turning the music up, keeps the demons at bay". This rings true for me, and as I sat in an empty office, I turned the music up & floated off in the sea of poetic words wrapped into a sweet melody.

So where ever you are, whatever you are doing, know that I love you... and  so does the God of the universe who expresses His love for you in so many ways (even in a song). May you be wrapped up in His love & forgiveness. May you be so overwhelmed that you sit on the edge of your seat... in your office, in the car pool line, in your classroom... praising Him for the love, laughter, trial & tears that have passed through your life. Speechless, because He has heard your lamentations & has not turned a deaf ear.

older, and not yet wiser.

I wonder when I will "arrive". You know, to the place when you are cool with doing the tough things. And by "tough" I mean letting your landlord know that, no it is not okay for green & black mold to be growing on the window frame, shoes & clothes.

As I wondered through Wallmart looking at bleach, cleaning products & brushes I was totally wishing that I had a man to take care of all of this junk. Slow down femenist Franny, I'm not your every day Sally that needs a man to take care of my needs... BUT it would be nice to have one around to help pick out bleach products, to scrape floor boards & to wear the mask to scrub the icky black mold off the frame. AND to kick my landlord's lazy butt into gear. I hope my "strong" email did the trick with that guy, you decide:

3 December 2009

Nick,

Thank you for coming by to look at the mold that is growing in my room. I am disappointed though that you would be so lack luster in looking at it for less than 1 minute & coming to the conclusion that it is all from the dryer. All the windows are fogged, yet only one window frame that is a science project with black mold is the one directly under the basement door (the basement door, which has a hole in it too).

I can appreciate wanting to “go the cheap way” in fixing this matter, but this is a serious problem that I would like handled before it turns into a bigger issue. The water in the basement needs to be removed immediately. I am bleaching the window frames and removing all of the black & green mold (and throwing away my shoes & washing all my clothes that have mold on them).

I am documenting your visit along with requesting a need for maintenance on the windows so that they can be opened and screens to help ventilation.

I would like to be kept in the loop on how you are taking care of the water in the basement, cleaning all mold spores (both green & black) down there & how you plan to maintain a dry/ventilated basement.

Best,
J. Arellano

I do know one thing for sure though... that I have a God that goes to bat for me all the time. And friends that with pinch hit for me & steal bases. Now if only I could embrace the mask & mold scraping I'd be all set.